Mar 17, 2013

Understanding Assertive Communication

By Zoe Smith


It is impossible to live in this world and not be in contact with another person. As such, it is of vital importance that we develop good communication skills to be able to express ourselves clearly and in doing so, establish better relationships with the people around us. What is assertive communication and how can we use this to our best advantage?

There are a few styles of communication that people knowingly or unknowingly use. Passive and Aggressive communication styles are born out of low self esteem. Passive communicators avoid self expression at any cost; and aggressive ones go overboard in defending their rights and opinions by being almost abusive. Some individuals belong to the passive-aggressive category, which is by subtly undercutting people because they themselves feel powerless, jealous and angry.

Obviously, we just discussed the communication styles that we should NOT use. However, it might be that you find yourself in one of these categories. Be very honest with yourself and check if you need to improve in this area- otherwise you can ruin vital relationships in your life. If you think you need work, then use this tool and purpose to become a better communicator starting right now.

Therefore the best communicators are the assertive communicators. These individuals are forthright and open when they express themselves and they are respectful of other people's views and opinions. They have a healthy self image so they do not have to put other people down or shy away from speaking out their own thoughts.

Being assertive benefits your professional life greatly. Being forthright, confident and honest are key proponents to effective decision making techniques. As opposed to passive decision makers who do not command respect; or aggressive personalities who are combative and oftentimes seen as too rude-assertive people solicit trust and inspire people to cooperate towards a single goal.

More importantly, understanding and utilizing assertive communication will improve your personal relationships as well. Nobody wants to hurt people they love and so most of us will shy away from correcting them, or do it the wrong way and turn them away. A good communicator will be able to correct lovingly, respectfully and effectively.

So how do we become better at this quality? One thing you need is to know yourself more and gain a deeper appreciation of yourself. If you have a healthy self image and love yourself well-you will not be afraid to assert your rights, nor feel that you have to be defensive and on attack when other people disagree with you. Take time to build up your spiritual, emotional and mental condition to enjoy a higher quality of living.

A healthy self image results in good self esteem. When you are happy with yourself, you won't be shy about your own opinions; nor will you be defensive and be on attack mode when somebody disagrees with your views. Make it a priority to develop your spiritual, emotional and mental condition to enjoy a higher level of existence and quality of living. But even if we do all this, we cannot help it if other people misunderstand us. Miscommunication is a staple in life so do not be upset when it happens. Do the right thing regardless and don't be defined by what other people think or say. Live well and enjoy all the richness that life has to offer you-you will be glad you did.




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