There is no doubt that one sure way to improve self-confidence is to model highly self-confident people. Self-confidence is all about believing in yourself, your own worth, your power and abilities, regardless of the situation you are in.A lot of people believe that self-confidence comes from the possession of high skill sets or knowledge. While being excellent in a particular area of expertise can give you a sense of high self-worth, it is not a necessarily a prerequisite for self-confidence.People who have high self-confidence have a strong sense of assurance and belief in themselves. They exude calmness, composure and self-awareness, and that is because, they have formed a set of habits that have become part of who they are and how they live their life.
It is important to understand that players, parents, coaches and therapists spend a lot of time building youngsters' confidence.I have dozens of them.Bedtime is a great time of the day to replace negative thoughts with positive ones. When you get ready to go to sleep, you can use this quiet time to build yourself up instead of dwelling on all that went wrong earlier in the day or worrying about what could go wrong tomorrow.
This is incredibly destructive to your self-confidence, because you don't get to trust and know who you say you are and do. You say one thing, but don't deliver, and this costs you your trust in yourself and your self-confidence.High self-confident people understand the importance of keeping their word. They understand that coming from this space of integrity, where their word is law, IS the key to accessing their own power and self-confidence, and in my opinion, is also the most important habit that leads to success in life.The trick is to start making smaller promises that you know you won't let yourself or others down. Be honest with yourself. Don't say yes to something when you know you can't fit it in.
Baby steps are the key here. If you try to do too much too soon, you will inevitably let something slip, and guess who will be watching?Choose Positive Self Talk.The primary keyword here is CHOOSE. No matter how many successes we have or how many things we do well, we continually doubt ourselves and our abilities.It might have something to do with the fact that over 75% of what we think is negative, which is completely counterproductive. With these kinds of statistics, it's no wonder we struggle to feel good about ourselves.One of the most important changes we can make in our life is choosing our self-talk.
Highly self-confident people have learned the habit of catching negative thoughts before they can have an effect on their moods, feelings and performance. They consciously choose to cancel these thoughts and replace them with positive empowering thoughts instead.They have formed the habit of saying: stop, cancel or pass, whenever they catch a negative thought... not giving any power to that thought... not reacting to it.Affirmations are a very powerful way of re-educating our minds to think empowering thoughts rather than the counterproductive negative thoughts.So CHOOSE to improve self-confidence by choosing positive thoughts and practice these using affirmations.
When you're in public and you see a very beautiful woman on the arm of a man who is plainly way out of her league, it's probably because he's the one who's had the guts to ask her out.One of my favourite sayings is - "Women go out with men who ask them". Now this doesn't mean that a woman will just go out with any old weirdo who hits on her, but that you're not going to get a woman if you don't ask her out. And often you'll be surprised at the results.
Be Courageous.Get out of your head and just do it.Low self-confident people tend to procrastinate and worry. They end up being hung up over negative outcomes and failures of the past, and they can't seem to find the courage to move forward.Highly self-confident people have learned that in order to succeed, they can create the possibility of being courageous anytime they want... this way, even if they are afraid, they can choose to take action... in spite of fear!
Other things you can do to build your self-confidence are:Learn something new. Learn a new language. Chicks are impressed by French and Italian. They're not impressed by Ancient Greek. Some women are impressed by your vast knowledge of the opera, some by your skills at cooking. Not many will be impressed by your love for Starcraft 2.Hit the gym. How important is it to look good? For yourself, VERY important. For her, somewhat important.
Don't overthink how much she wants you to have a six-pack though. She may well be impressed with it, but you don't want her to think you're more vain than she is.Learn how to dress well. I'm no haberdasher, but it's simple to dress well. Suits are easy to wear and ensure you are clean, and you have decent shoes. For some reason women love shoes.Now those are simple things most of us can do better. Increasing our abilities to be more pleasing to the eye and interesting to the ear will ensure that we feel more ready to talk to women we don't know.Lastly, I will say that it's very important to understand why we lack confidence.
At university I had a fear of public speaking. My mentor asked me why and I mentioned it was because I was afraid that people would laugh at me. He asked me if I laughed at people when they were talking in public and I realised that I did not. I had thought for ages that strangers were possessed of the most negative traits and in fact most people are kind and interested, otherwise they wouldn't have been listening to me in the first place.Women are like that.
Project yourself into the future and ask if what you're faced with is as onerous as you fear. This might be a bit morbid and yet this works tremendously well. Imagine yourself on your deathbed looking back over your life. You are surrounded by your friends and family. You're reviewing your life. Is what you're faced with now even going to pop up? That's highly unlikely. Keeping things in proper perspective really diminishes fear.Remember that you lose out on 100% of the opportunities that you never go for. Nothing ventured-Nothing gained. To get what you want, ask for it. If you consistently ask people for what you want, you will get it. As you think about your goals and what you are striving for, how effective would it be for you to believe that several people out there want to and would be willing to help you if you only ask? People will help because they know they might need help in the future and you might be a source. Whether that is true or not in the "real world" is irrelevant. The belief is empowering, I invite you to adopt it.
It is important to understand that players, parents, coaches and therapists spend a lot of time building youngsters' confidence.I have dozens of them.Bedtime is a great time of the day to replace negative thoughts with positive ones. When you get ready to go to sleep, you can use this quiet time to build yourself up instead of dwelling on all that went wrong earlier in the day or worrying about what could go wrong tomorrow.
This is incredibly destructive to your self-confidence, because you don't get to trust and know who you say you are and do. You say one thing, but don't deliver, and this costs you your trust in yourself and your self-confidence.High self-confident people understand the importance of keeping their word. They understand that coming from this space of integrity, where their word is law, IS the key to accessing their own power and self-confidence, and in my opinion, is also the most important habit that leads to success in life.The trick is to start making smaller promises that you know you won't let yourself or others down. Be honest with yourself. Don't say yes to something when you know you can't fit it in.
Baby steps are the key here. If you try to do too much too soon, you will inevitably let something slip, and guess who will be watching?Choose Positive Self Talk.The primary keyword here is CHOOSE. No matter how many successes we have or how many things we do well, we continually doubt ourselves and our abilities.It might have something to do with the fact that over 75% of what we think is negative, which is completely counterproductive. With these kinds of statistics, it's no wonder we struggle to feel good about ourselves.One of the most important changes we can make in our life is choosing our self-talk.
Highly self-confident people have learned the habit of catching negative thoughts before they can have an effect on their moods, feelings and performance. They consciously choose to cancel these thoughts and replace them with positive empowering thoughts instead.They have formed the habit of saying: stop, cancel or pass, whenever they catch a negative thought... not giving any power to that thought... not reacting to it.Affirmations are a very powerful way of re-educating our minds to think empowering thoughts rather than the counterproductive negative thoughts.So CHOOSE to improve self-confidence by choosing positive thoughts and practice these using affirmations.
When you're in public and you see a very beautiful woman on the arm of a man who is plainly way out of her league, it's probably because he's the one who's had the guts to ask her out.One of my favourite sayings is - "Women go out with men who ask them". Now this doesn't mean that a woman will just go out with any old weirdo who hits on her, but that you're not going to get a woman if you don't ask her out. And often you'll be surprised at the results.
Be Courageous.Get out of your head and just do it.Low self-confident people tend to procrastinate and worry. They end up being hung up over negative outcomes and failures of the past, and they can't seem to find the courage to move forward.Highly self-confident people have learned that in order to succeed, they can create the possibility of being courageous anytime they want... this way, even if they are afraid, they can choose to take action... in spite of fear!
Other things you can do to build your self-confidence are:Learn something new. Learn a new language. Chicks are impressed by French and Italian. They're not impressed by Ancient Greek. Some women are impressed by your vast knowledge of the opera, some by your skills at cooking. Not many will be impressed by your love for Starcraft 2.Hit the gym. How important is it to look good? For yourself, VERY important. For her, somewhat important.
Don't overthink how much she wants you to have a six-pack though. She may well be impressed with it, but you don't want her to think you're more vain than she is.Learn how to dress well. I'm no haberdasher, but it's simple to dress well. Suits are easy to wear and ensure you are clean, and you have decent shoes. For some reason women love shoes.Now those are simple things most of us can do better. Increasing our abilities to be more pleasing to the eye and interesting to the ear will ensure that we feel more ready to talk to women we don't know.Lastly, I will say that it's very important to understand why we lack confidence.
At university I had a fear of public speaking. My mentor asked me why and I mentioned it was because I was afraid that people would laugh at me. He asked me if I laughed at people when they were talking in public and I realised that I did not. I had thought for ages that strangers were possessed of the most negative traits and in fact most people are kind and interested, otherwise they wouldn't have been listening to me in the first place.Women are like that.
Project yourself into the future and ask if what you're faced with is as onerous as you fear. This might be a bit morbid and yet this works tremendously well. Imagine yourself on your deathbed looking back over your life. You are surrounded by your friends and family. You're reviewing your life. Is what you're faced with now even going to pop up? That's highly unlikely. Keeping things in proper perspective really diminishes fear.Remember that you lose out on 100% of the opportunities that you never go for. Nothing ventured-Nothing gained. To get what you want, ask for it. If you consistently ask people for what you want, you will get it. As you think about your goals and what you are striving for, how effective would it be for you to believe that several people out there want to and would be willing to help you if you only ask? People will help because they know they might need help in the future and you might be a source. Whether that is true or not in the "real world" is irrelevant. The belief is empowering, I invite you to adopt it.
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